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trust possibility to be in the road

Posted by on Oct 8, 2012 in mixed media, paint, sketchbook | 3 comments

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We have this history of impossible solutions to insoluble problems.

Will Eisner

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I have a friend who always knows what could go wrong. Under the guise of caution, he is, most of all, cautious with his faith. And he’s very cautious with his dreams. Although imperfectly, this is not how I live my life. Generally I take on a little more than I can handle, get bids on things I can’t afford, draw plans for projects bigger than my skills, and make lists for things that, yes, seem impossible.

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The one place I get miserly in my faith is with myself, with my own most personal dreams. I tell my kids to never let anything stop them, to go forth believing everything will work out even better than expected, and I’ve watched their lives grow accordingly…

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But I don’t afford myself the same sort of full and magical belief that it’s not all up to me. I tend to work as though everything in my life is strictly dependent upon proving myself, through sheer will, grit and elbow grease.

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But while will, grit, and elbow grease are all very handy tools to keep in my toolbox, I don’t actually believe they are the answer, at least not alone. I know in my heart that there is an easier way of living, that joy actually wants to be felt.

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So I’m setting out again, this time with a new intention. I’m going forward believing that there will be things waiting in my path to surprise me, to aide me, to make my load light. I’m going forth, beginning now, believing the journey itself actually wants to bring me joy.

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Because suddenly I realize that that is what I’ve known all along.

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Partial page text: Don’t invent your own bad press. Don’t invest in old ghosts. Don’t believe that old scars foretell new injuries. Remember what you know, not what the gremlins tell you. Forge, baby! The past is not where your future lies!

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Traffic Control

Posted by on Oct 1, 2012 in mixed media, sketchbook | 3 comments

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I did this page in my art journal a few weeks ago, but it sure applies today. This is the kind of weekend it was: best laid plans derailed. And the week is starting out much the same, with sick kids and a mess in the house and more commitments than I can keep.

Mostly, I work well like this. I’m okay to go with the flow and be surrounded by a little bit of surprise and chaos…

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But there is a serene-seeking side of me too, and she’s been feeling a little snarky about things. She’s needing attention, that quiet side. After all that writing time she was getting, she got spoiled, and now she’s feeling neglected because writing time has been in short supply; nobody’s listening to her whispers.

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So I find myself seeking a routine that includes quiet…

Some weeks that’s easy — some, not so much.

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Mostly, I’ve learned to be okay with the traffic jams. I know that they never last; I know that the the slow spots work out and then I’ll be on my way again, complete with quiet and serenity (well) and, yes, even some time to hear the whispers of my soul.

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I guess what I’m saying is, I’ve learned to sketch, doodle and art journal my way through heavy traffic times and at all red lights.

Which works out really well

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Partial page text: Week after week I set new goals and day after day they get derailed. If ever I *almost* get on a roll, some bizarre variable rushes in like a drunken linebacker and knocks me off my feet. I barely have a chance to shift into gear and the light changes. Red, every time. And suddenly I find myself restarting again… I’m looking for better traffic control.

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Stretch Yourself

Posted by on Sep 23, 2012 in art, inspire, mixed media, paint, sketchbook | 2 comments

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Stretch Yourself.

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Text: Yoga, Japanese, surfing, watercolor, clarinet, French. How to drive a motorcycle, roll a kayak, find a clam, catch a fish. How to knit.

There is so much I want to learn. More, if you choose to measure it, than I could ever fit in my days. I choose not to measure it. I choose not to decide what *doesn’t* fit and instead stretch, reach, believe in all that does. This does. Art does. Joy does. Being awake in every minute and doing what I can with it does. The rest will turn out.

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